There is a day for pretty much everything. This includes a day that looks to a future when cats will have taken over in ways that we only thought superpowers like USA and China were capable of. It’s June 24th – Cat World Domination day.
If you are one of those people who can’t stand the thought of felines crawling through your window and pouring garbage all over you at any time of the night, this post is for you.
So, here are some indications that your own cat could be part of some secret society plotting a global-takeover.
Mind Control
Your kitty is taking over your mind in various ways. They act like they don’t care when you approach them, but come and sit on your lap when you don’t. They look at your directly and hypnotically for ages. It’s all part of a mind control programme – a deliberate strategy to soften you up.
It’s highly likely your cat is part of a secret society keeping tabs on how many owners have been successfully brainwashed each week. At the heart of this society, is the goal that June 24 is preparation for.
Memes and Youtube Vids
Not only is your own cat targeting your mind, but collectively they are conducting a mass propaganda campaign via Facebook, Tiktok, and other social media. All that acting cute pays off in many ways – including getting owners to post and share lots of memes and videos online.
Leaving you Presents
If you have ever found a dead mouse on your doorstep, you may have googled it and read that something about how it is meant to be gift to you from your cat.
Those human cat-behaviourists – if only they really knew their secret lives! Even in the cat world, there is no such thing as a free lunch, and maybe the dead mouse wasn’t intended for your consumption anyway.
Your cat is not only telling you you are pretty soft when it comes to killing your prey, but to remind you who’s boss, kind of like a scene from The Godfather.
Sleep Deprivation
Behaviourists may have missed something with regards to Midnight Zoomies – those times when cats rush around in a frenzy just as you are about to go to bed. It is all to deprive you of sleep. The more tired you are, the more likely you are to bend to their will.
Evidence of Takeover
Cats have infiltrated the corridors of power. In the UK there is Larry who sits in no 10 Downing Street all day, waiting for the human Prime Minister to come back and feed him luxury feline food. He’s met some very important guests in his time, and must have been privy to some interesting information. There’s also Gladstone the Treasury cat. – no longer there, but has surely passed on some knowledge about the inner workings of human government.
These are just two of a long tradition of kitties housed in governmental quarters, from Cabinet to the Foreign Office. However, before there was anything like organised politics in the UK….
Cats as Gods
The ancient Egyptians believed cats were magical animals who brought good luck to their owners. This is something that the domestic cat has never forgotten, and hence why they have such high self worth. Whether you call it delusions of grandeur, or innate sense of majesty, they believe their rightful place is on the throne. Of course, you are their servant!
Their Goal
The question someone might ask is, what will they do once cats get world domination?’ The answer is unquestionably – very little.
There’s no doubt, they’ll still like to chase and fight other animals, but otherwise your cat will probably just want you to pamper them and cater to their whims. That’s not just the ones who are nicely housed, but those currently living on the streets.
There is nothing like Karma and retribution in the feline world. Signs of non-compliance from owners (especially former ones) will no doubt not go unnoticed when global domination finally comes.
So on Cat World Domination day, here is what you can do to spare yourself from future trouble;
- Supply lots of treats, toys, food and other items of interest throughout this day.
- Make a fuss of them when they want it
- Put up with their midnight ‘zoomie’ bursts of energy
- Be kind to cats everywhere.
- Do these all on the other 364 days as well.
The secret society will know if you don’t
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